Shannon’s Adventures in Hippyland #1
If any terms and/or
nicknames I use offend you, I apologize.
I write for humor value and to share my experiences with others. I hope you can see and enjoy the humor
without getting all wrapped up in perceived offense.
Recently, I have
been watching some documentaries. They
have been about various subjects but most centered on the food industry and/or
changing your eating style. Saying that the
films scared the wheat grass out of me would be an understatement.
Due to what I have
learned, I have decided to make a lifestyle change regarding my diet. I am sure this will be a long process. I am sure it will be achieved with baby steps
and the occasional leap. The past few
days have been leaps.
One of these leaps
was venturing into the ‘Wholy Land’ of Hippyland. I was pretty sure I would be met with
pitchforks and torches. I figured the
natives would scream sayings like, “Egg Slayer!”, “Chicken Choker” (that saying
was pulled due to popular misconception) and “Meat lovers should be left at the
curb for recycling pick up!” That last
saying really never made it out of beta testing and failed several focus groups.
Strangely enough no
one seemed to notice the obvious non-hippy’s entrance into Hippyland. Could this place be open to all? Most people even said hello! Now I know I’m
in Hippyland! When I stood in the
produce section looking clueless people asked if I needed assistance. I’m not talking about the employees, though
they asked as well. Regular people asked
me if they could be of help!
Once I was done in
the produce section I wandered the store looking for a couple of items on my
list. As I perused the aisles I saw her.
She was perfect. She was so grand
and regal. I dubbed her the Queen
Hippy. She floated around with the assurance
of one who has created a close friendship with the store. She had one baby strapped to her front and
another snuggled to her back. Both were
sound asleep. The bustle of the store
was obviously familiar to them.
Once I reached the
checkout lane I was a bit intimidated to find that I was directly behind Her
Majesty. Would my purchases be
mocked? I was still new to this attempt
at healthy eating. Would the Royal
Blessing be bestowed upon my cart? I
just kept my focus on the conveyor a hoped she would not notice me. She turned back to my purchases.
“Oh, that looks
good”, she said.
She was speaking of
my cereal choice. I told her where I had
read about it.
YES! I had the Royal Blessing! I felt much more confident having survived my
first trip to Hippyland. And that I
received a compliment on a purchase?
Well, that was just soy-based icing on the gluten-free no animal product
cake.
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